Thursday, October 2, 2008

My Advice to Biden (and Obama, too)

This is all you need to do: just hit the ball back. Be Björn Borg -- one of the greatest tennis players ever (from one of the best eras of tennis ever), he hung out at the baseline, just hitting the ball back, not trying to do anything fancy, not going for the putaway shot, just hitting the ball back, over and over and over again. That was his game: calm consistency. And he kept it up long enough so that most of the time, the other guy screwed up and Borg won the point (often times, if the player was someone volatile, like John McEnroe, his victories would come amidst lots of spitting and crying).

Anyway, my point is to be calm and consistent, and don't try to score the gotchas or the zingers, because your opponent is inexperienced and has a lot to prove, so chances are she'll be overreaching. If you just keep hitting the ball back to her, she'll eventually screw up -- and she doesn't need any help from you to do so. So be chill and mellow.

(And in the case of Obama, this goes doubly, because John McCain is flailing all over the place, like a drunk trying to find the door in the dark, AND he's got a pissy temper. He'll totally play the John McEnroe to your Björn Borg, if you'll just let him.)